Today I tried to drive to my Saturday job at ESPNU in Ballantyne but as I started getting close I ran into a police blockade. There was a huge, endless mass of people walking on the street that the station is located on. Usually this corporate park area is practically deserted on the weekends but thousands of people now blocked my way to work. It was the middle of a “Walk to Defeat ALS” 3K fundraiser. Well I had to be at work in 10 minutes, so I had no choice but to pull my car into the nearest parking lot and walk the final 0.4 miles of my commute.
Of course my walking to work pretty much meant that I was inadvertently and unavoidably joining the ALS walk in progress. Luckily I had to go the same direction as all the walkers – it would have been a mess if I had to swim against the current! But even though I was only walking to work, it felt wrong. I didn’t raise any money for ALS, and I had jumped into the course in the middle too. It felt like I was cheating somehow, like that woman who cheated in the 1980 Boston Marathon by taking the subway and jumping into the race a mile before the finish line. I tried walking on the grass and sidewalk instead of the road to separate myself from the crowd but that, along with the fact that I was clearly not dressed for this, just drew glares from the walkers.
As I continued on my way I thought about the movie The Fugitive, when Harrison Ford’s character gets away from the police by blending in with the St. Patrick’s Day Parade. I also thought about the scene in Animal House when Stork jumped into the homecoming parade and took control of the marching band. Hmm, I wonder if I can get these walkers to follow me into the ESPNU parking lot? Well I was hoping for some lemmings, but I’m sad to say that I was unable to veer anybody off their course.
